


Emotions and the Problems They Cause

by savsfeelings



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: F/M, Frenemies Dib & Zim (Invader Zim), Irken Empire (Invader Zim), Older Dib (Invader Zim)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-06
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:20:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25105339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/savsfeelings/pseuds/savsfeelings
Summary: Zim has never been the smartest invader. When his leaders threaten the life of his new romantic interest, his first idea is to confront his Almighty Tallest face to face. Does this go well? No. The good news is that his new girl, Gaz, is safe--the bad news is that he is now in prison.Dib isn't having such a cakewalk either. Tak, his former crush, is right in his path, professing her feelings for him. Unfortunately for Dib, Tak's allegiance lies only with her leaders.
Relationships: Dib/Tak (Invader Zim), Gaz/Zim (Invader Zim)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 9





	1. Chapter 1

"You LITERALLY cannot be this stupid." Red placed his hands on his hips and floated towards them. "I JUST told you that I was going to kill your little girlfriend the next time I saw her, and here you are. I know you know that it takes at least six months to get to Earth. You had plenty of time to flee."

Purple stopped packing and stood next to Red, arms crossed. "Yeah, dude, what's wrong with you?"

Zim stood still, too dumbfounded to be defiant. "I...don't know." All of a sudden he was confused. Just the morning before he was trying to get his drivers' license, and now he was on his home planet. How did he think this was a good idea?

Gaz's eyes looked at him intently, confused and caring. "Zim," she said cautiously, taking a step back. "What's going on?"

Zim turned to look at her. The Tallest stayed silent. "I think you should go." The words felt heavy in his mouth.

"Go where?" She looked so bewildered and beautiful, her eyes catching every kind of light, that Zim had to close his eyes. 

Zim shrugged. "Away. Downstairs. Gir will take you home." He turned back to the tallest.

"I..." Gaz didn't know what to say. Part of her told her to assume that this was part of the plan, but the other part noticed Zim's face: worn and tired. She hadn't thought what all this stress had done to him. "Okay," she answered finally. All this time, all this energy, and the Tallest weren't even interested in her--Zim was clearly what they wanted. They hadn't so much as looked at her when she came up, cool and defiant, Zim's hand in hers. Zim couldn't have been a good invader--she knew that. She finally came to the conclusion that she was just a chess piece in their game with the universe, just a ploy to get Zim here. They knew he'd make a stupid mistake. Gaz stepped backwards into the elevator, and rode the way down alone.

"We are reassigning Earth to a new invader," Red said. His gaze was forceful and piercing, and Zim gulped. "You are no longer fit to serve the Irken armada."

Zim just nodded. There was not much else he could do. Two guards appeared at either side of him, clad in glowing blue armor. The Tallest's guards: the toughest in the galaxy. Each one was tall and stocky, like a wrestler. They grabbed his arms and took him away, down a long corridor lined with rooms. 

"Teenage hormones..." Purple said, barely audible. It was the last thing Zim heard before he was placed in his cell. 

"Zim," the guards chanted, "Former invader of the Irken armada, you are sentenced to 400 years imprisonment for the treasonous crime that you have befallen upon our Almighty Tallest."

The ride down was tough. Gaz felt like crying, but the tears couldn't come. She huddled in the corner of the elevator, legs crossed at the ankles. The doors opened and out she stepped, feeling weirdly...neutral. Like her distaste for Zim was back. But the tug in her stomach when she turned away from the closing doors told her otherwise.

Tak was sitting on a fold-up chair looking at her nails while Dib sat handcuffed at her feet. Neither looked particularly guilty or disheveled, which was a relief. 

Tak just glanced in her direction and pursed her lips. She didn't seem surprised that Zim wasn't with her.

"Gaz!" Dib exclaimed, scooching around until he could see her. "You're okay! Oh, thank God! I was so worried!" Dib's cheeks were flushed with relief, his eyes big and open.

Gaz just nodded. Just then Gir came bounding out of nowhere, rubber pig in hand. "GAZZY!" Gir screeched, running at her full force. He wrapped his arms around her leg like a toddler. Gaz pat his head but otherwise stayed silent. The big question filled the room. Gir was the only one brave, or oblivious, enough to ask it: "Where's Master?"

Three pairs of eyes burned into Gaz's skin, all of them already sorry for her. She hated that look. She had gotten it plenty when her mom died--enough for one lifetime. She tried to think of something to say. "He didn't come," she said lamely. "I mean...he just--the Tallest, they--"

"What your little HUMAN means to say," Tak said, rolling her eyes, "is that the threat to Gaz's life isn't real."

Gaz stood still. She had been right. "Yeah," was all she could say. Everyone was still looking at her: Dib with his eyes full of sorrow, still handcuffed and sitting on the ground, looking crumpled like the whole weight of the world was on his shoulders; Tak, with her arms crossed, eyes flicking over her with distaste; and Gir, still holding her leg, whimpering like a puppy.

Dib nodded and pressed his lips together, the redness creeping up his neck indicating his anger. "They just wanted Zim," he said flatly, his anger thinly veiled. "And you," he jerked his head at Tak, "only kissed me to distract me." He eyed her bejeweled antennae. "You don't even work in this building, do you? You knew Zim was coming."

Tak pursed her lips and looked down at the ground. She didn't speak. She didn't have to.

"Only one guard in the Tallest's tower..." Dib chuckled to himself. "This isn't their real tower. This is," Dib looked around quickly, trying to gather clues. "This is something else."

Everyone stayed silent. Even Gir seemed to know the weight of the moment. He had let go of Gaz and was standing still and silent, his face blank.

"Can we just go home?" Gaz said softly, head down. "We're allowed to leave. No one cares that we're here." Dib nodded.

"What about Master?" Gir looked at Gaz, his eyes full of something she couldn't quite place. Hope, maybe.

"I'll take care of him," Tak said, walking over to grab the small robot's hand. 

"Oh, great, so now you choose to be helpful." Gaz crossed her arms over her chest.

"I did not enjoy my time on Earth," Tak said flatly, eyes narrowed, "so you mean nothing to me." Gaz saw Dib bite his lip and look down. She knew those words must have cut deep. Tak had used him, plain and simple, and Dib would be paying the price of that kiss for the rest of his life.

"Will he go back to Zim?" Dib stood up now, standing at a solid six foot one. His arms were tense. He took a step towards them. "Or, you know, do you melt the robots down and make them into frisbees? Or plates? Or do you just throw them away when you're done with them, like they're disposable?"

Gir's robotic brow furrowed, like he was absorbing the words one at a time. Tak patted his head, being surprisingly affectionate. She smiled down at him, teeth razor sharp. "No," she practically cooed, shooting a look at Dib, "we reprogram them. They get to serve new masters every couple of years."

Gir took a step back. "But," he said slowly, "My master is Zim."

Tak flashed another razor sharp smile. "Not for long."

It was then that Gir took off running. He didn't yell anything, which took them all by surprise. Gaz called his name and took off after him. Dib tried to do so as well, but with the press of a button on Tak's bracelet, Dib was writhing on the ground in pain. He groaned.

"Sorry," Tak said. "I can't let you go just yet. The Tallest still have plans for you."


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gaz finds Gir and convinces him to come back to the tower, where Tak is waiting with Dib. Wouldn't it be nice if they could just leave? It sure would, but Gir says a certain something that makes Gaz unable to leave without Zim.

The rain felt like acid on Gaz's skin, and she was momentarily thankful that Zim had bought her the thick coat. It felt and looked like leather, but she knew better than to check the tag. She couldn't read Irken anyway.

The sky above was red as blood, with clouds tinged with darkness black as pitch. Gaz ran through the Irken streets, now empty, calling out for Gir. She came across an overlook and put her hands on her knees, panting. The view was gorgeous, the giant Irken towers huddled up like children, all the purple bathed in a red glow. The rain shimmered, every drop like oil, turning the view into a Van Gogh painting. Gaz noticed she wasn't the only one enjoying it: Gir sat on a bench to the right of her. The rain slipped and slid around his small metal frame. His face was sad.

"Gir," Gaz said. She stood awkwardly next to him, her hands in the soft pockets. She was sorry to say she didn't know the little robot very well. "I've been looking everywhere for you."

Gir sat motionless and silent. Black lightning crackled overhead. Gaz winced as she crouched down in front of him, taking off her hood and exposing more skin to the rain. Her face was soft and worried. She couldn't tell if he could see her; his eyes didn't move. "Let's go back to Dib, okay?" She reached for his hand. Gir scooted away from her. Gaz pressed her lips together. "Look," she started softly, "there's no way we're going to let them reprogram you. You're with us now, and even without..." Gaz gulped. "Even without...you know, you could still come back to Earth with us. We'd take care of you. My dad's a scientist, so he could really--"

"I'm not going back to Earth." Gir's face was still blank, and the serious words sounded foreign coming from his mouth.

Gaz wasn't surprised that this was his reaction. She couldn't imagine living without her dad, especially since her mom died. What did surprise her, though, was how easily she gave up Zim--how she was so ready and willing to go home without him. She couldn't remember what it was like before he came into her life. Gaz closed her eyes and sighed. She remembered seeing him the previous morning: white button down shirt, black jeans, checkered Vans. She remembered realizing her crush on him. She looked behind Gir at the empty wet street. She may never get the chance to tell him how she felt, or how he looked that day...

Hot, Gaz thought, but pushed it from her mind as soon as it entered. Now wasn't the time to feel like...that.

Gir's eyes focused on her as she was remembering. Her lips moved, her eyes big and desperate. Gir could see how his master thought she was pretty, although he usually didn't understand words like that.

"Gazzy is pretty," Gir said, smiling. Gaz's eyes snapped back to him and she smiled too. 

"Thanks," she said, laughing a little. "Do you want to go back to Dib? I mean, are you ready? To go?" Gaz's smile wavered a little. She wasn't great with kids, or pets, or...robots.

Gir hopped off the bench. "Will Dib eat some of my waffles?"

"Sure," Gaz said tentatively. "Yeah. Waffles. Dib...loves those."

She didn't know whether to pick him up or hold his hand or just let him be. She decided on the latter. The rain had stopped, and the whole planet seemed to be bathed in that hypnotic dark rainbow light, every alien streetlamp illuminating the buildings. The colors made them look angry and vibrant, and, unsettled, Gaz decided to look at the bricks at her feet as she walked. Gir skipped behind her, loudly relaying his waffle recipe.

"Am I arrested?" Dib panted, laying on the floor, covered in a thin layer of sweat. 

"This isn't Earth, idiot. You don't really get any rights." Tak stood over him.

"Darn," Dib mumbled. He really wanted to say something stronger, but he was worried about Tak's bracelet of pain thing. He didn't want to know the policy about cursing. "So," he started, sitting up. Tak stared him down, her finger inching towards the button.

"No no no!" Dib raised his hands, bound by the handcuffs. "I just...I'm not going to run."

Tak eyed him coolly, eyes narrowed, but put her hand down firmly by her side. She walked to the folding chair and grabbed her spear. "I have something worse than those handcuffs." She glared at him.

Dib grimaced. "What is with you?"

"What?" Tak asked, too forcefully, quickly walking toward him with her spear in her hand.

Dib raised his hands again. "I just mean, like, you win. You don't have to keep threatening me, I'm not going anywhere."

Tak pushed him down, the toe of her black boot on his chest. She kept it there. "Maybe I just like to see you squirm." She pointed her spear an inch from his nose. Dib crossed his eyes to look at it.

For a second there was silence. Both were panting although they hadn't moved. Something electric buzzed in the air, making the back of Dib's neck prickle. Tak's eyes were full of anger and hatred, and something else: uncertainty?

"Okay, let's go home." Gaz entered the room, Gir in tow. "How do we get to--whoa." Gaz knit her eyebrows. "What's...going on here?"

Tak practically jumped off of Dib, and he sent a silent "thank you" to a god he didn't believe in. He wasn't sure what would have happened if Gaz hadn't walked in. His whole body felt hot.

"Nothing," both Dib and Tak said in unison. Tak glared at him.

"Okay," Gaz's face looked worn, and she didn't look convinced. Dib decided to convince her later. "Can we go home now, please?" She looked at Tak. "How do we get home?"

"I'll have guards escort you out." Tak crossed her arms and jerked her chin in Dib's direction. "But he stays."

"What?" Gaz didn't even bother looking surprised: this seemed to be the theme on this planet. 

"The Tallest have plans for him." Tak shrugged. "That's all I know."

Gir ran to Dib. "Do you want WAFFLES?" He happily shoved a plate in Dib's face. 

"Oh, I..." Dib held up his hands, still restrained. "I wish I could."

Gir was silent for a moment, slowly removing the waffles from between them. Then he simply opened the top of his head and out came a robotic arm. The arm, a series of small screens running up the top, was patted and clicked by Gir until it could undo Dib's handcuffs. They fell to the ground with a heavy clang. 

Everyone stood dumbfounded, their mouths hanging open. Gaz took a step towards them. "Did you just--"

"WAFFLES?" The plate was back in front of Dib's face. Dib was hesitant, but figured that he probably owed Gir for quite literally setting him free. 

Dib took a tentative bite. "Mmmm," he started, staring intently into Gir's eyes. He turned his gaze onto Gaz, who shrugged. "Mmmm," he said again, chewing, then "oh, mmm! You guys have to try this!" Dib devoured the first waffle. "It's not even my carb day," he said in between bites, "but--"

Gaz held up a hand. "Stop," she said, cringing. "Stop. No more. We get it, you work out."

Tak fingered her antenna, feeling shy all of a sudden. She remembered why she had chosen Dib as her fake love and not another human. He definitely wasn't the least attractive human she had ever seen. He didn't look anything like the disgusting beings she saw on Irken   
TV. "I should probably take you up now," she blurted out. Dib noticed her face was dark red under the green: an Irken blush. He smirked a little; he couldn't help it.

"Why now?" Gaz was clearly unaware of the buzz between them. Her face was hard and tired.

"Just..." Tak shrugged. "Zim is probably in prison now."

"Zim is in PRISON?" Gaz's mouth stayed open. "Why?"

"He fell in love with you, and that's treason. He was supposed to be taking over the planet, not using it as an intergalactic Tinder."

Dib raised his eyebrows. "You guys have Tinder here?"

Tak made a face at him.

Gaz didn't speak. She didn't know how to feel. Everyone else ignored that little tidbit of information except Gir.

"MASTER LOVES GAZZY! MASTER LOVES GAZZY!" Gir danced around in circles. No one felt compelled to stop him, so he continued chanting.

Gaz gulped. She knew what she was about to say was completely, utterly ridiculous; and not to mention practically impossible. But it was the "practically" that tugged at her heart. With everyone's help, maybe she could do it. She bit her lip. With all the help she could muster, and all the intelligence in the room, just maybe she could save Zim.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uh oh! Tak has been a naughty girl, calling the guards while the Zim Rescue Team was trying to figure out how to break him out of prison. But don't worry--Gir is on it! Hopefully he can stall the guards and buy them some time.

"Gaz, you have no plan," Dib said, standing up. He ran a hand through his hair and stepped towards her. "You don't know anything about the intergalactic criminal justice system."

Gaz walked over to him, eyes bright. "We could make a plan." She turned to Gir. "Do you have a piece of paper?" Gir was still chanting. "Gir?" She asked again, a little more forcefully. Her cheeks were pink, and a part of her didn't want him to stop saying those magical words. But if the plan went well, she would hear them soon enough.

Gir stopped and ran over to them. "Cupcake?"

"No Gir," Gaz said, her face tight. "Paper. Paper to draw on."

"Drawing?" Gir said excitedly. He jumped up and down. "I love drawing! I draw nice pictures for Master!"

"No plans," Tak said, walking over to the three. "And NO paper." She narrowed her eyes at Gir.

He whimpered. "But--"

"No."

"Draw--"

"No! And I don't want to have to tell you again." She stared him down until Gir sadly lowered his head.

"And she's good with kids..." Dib said, smiling at Gaz and laying out his hands.

Gaz looked up at him and raised her palm. "I SO don't want to hear it." She turned her head to Tak. "Look, I know we're not friends--"

"I don't have friends," Tak spat, crossing her arms. "I don't need them."

"That's...sad, but--"

"It is NOT sad. What's sad is that you pathetic little humans are attempting to create an ultimately futile plan to break Zim out of the most sophisticated prison system in the universe." Tak laughed triumphantly. "And what you don't know is that I have already called the guards to take you to prison too! Ha-ha!" Tak's bracelet beeped, as if on cue.

"You called guards on us? To take us to intergalactic prison?" Dib knit his brows. "Why? How are we a threat to you?"

"Not to me," Tak sneered, "But as a royal guard I cannot let anyone, let alone filthy little humans, discuss planning to break someone out of prison." She placed a hand over her heart. "That's a direct threat to my Tallest." 

They heard footsteps start outside. Dozens of guards clad in glowing blue armor were going to storm the tower any second. 

Gaz's eyes lit up. "Gir," she said, getting down on her knees. "There are people outside who are hungry."

Gir raised his head. "Hungry?"

"And they really, really want--"

"CUPCAKES!" Gir ran full force, zig-zagging across the red rug, just as they saw a dozen glowing blue heads start to appear through the frosted glass. Gaz sent a silent prayer to her mom that Gir would please, just this once, use the door; and she squeezed her eyes shut, anticipating the cold metal around her hands, the zap of an electric current, her eyes rolling back, her toes curling, her body hitting the floor, pure dead weight--

The door clicked shut. She let out a sigh of relief and a quiet "thank you."

"WHO'S HUNGRY?" Gir screamed, his voice muffled through the thick wood and heavy glass. The glowing heads didn't retreat, but they didn't come any closer.

Gaz got up off of her knees, her entire body weighed down as if by lead. "So--" she started, but Dib cut her off with a loud thud as he slammed his body into Tak's.

"The spear!" He cried out, "Get the spear!"

Gaz, too surprised to question his command, ran to where Tak had been standing and picked the spear up off the ground. She marveled for a moment at the crackling blue electricity as it crept in and out of the silver etchings. She turned her head to look at Dib. His face was red and furious, his hands clamped down on Tak's wrists, looking back at Gaz.

"What are you doing? Get over here!"

Gaz walked quickly to where they were, and stood awkwardly next to them.

"I know you're hurt," Gaz started softly, reaching out a hand to Dib's shoulder. "But maybe we should think carefully before--"

Tak struggled and took advantage of Dib listening to his sister. She smacked her forehead towards his face and his head shot back, his eyes shut with pain. He let go of one of her wrists to put a hand over his nose. Tak used her free hand to grab his neck, but his pain lasted less than a second. He slammed her wrist back down, his nose dripping blood, eyes wild and huge behind his glasses. "Oh, I don't think so," he said quietly, smiling deviously and shaking his head. 

Gaz stood as still and tense as a statue, tightly gripping the spear's handle. She thought quickly of what to do next. She had to control Dib, that much was clear. She took a few wobbly steps closer to the two of them. "Don't scream," she said nervously, pointing the spear down at Tak's face. It was heavy, and she fought to keep the tip in place as it dipped and swayed in her hands.

"Or what?" Tak said, eyes dark and filled with rage. She continued to struggle, trying to avoid Dib's eyes, but he kept his gaze intently locked onto hers. "If I scream, the guards come in and kill you."

Gaz glanced at the doors. The dozen glowing blue heads were gone, and she felt pride surging in her throat. "What guards?" She said. Her voice was quiet but even, and she let herself smile like a canary was singing in her throat. 

Uncertainty started to fill Tak's eyes. "Nervous?" Dib asked, voice almost sweet. "Don't be. We just need a few favors."


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On a time crunch, the Zim Rescue Team miraculously makes their way up the top of the tower.

Tak struggled in her restraints. "You can't keep me here forever!" She spat. Dib was holding her bracelet, looking at it with wonder. He turned his back on Tak and faced Gaz.

"I don't know how this thing works." He put a hand on his hip. "It's all in Irken."

"If only somebody here could read Irken," Tak called out.

Dib turned to face her. "You know we can't let you go," he said softly, eyes sad. He shook his head and looked back at Gaz. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but...we need Gir."

On cue, Gir burst through the frosted glass, covered in pink frosting. "THEY WERE HUNGRY!" He screeched. "GAZZY WAS RIGHT!" Gaz looked behind him. Dozens of stocky bodies clad in glowing blue armor were piled up in the street. Gaz grimaced. So much for keeping a low profile. 

"You couldn't have used the door?" Dib muttered, looking out through the broken glass. 

Tak chuckled. "It's only a matter of time now."

Gir sped through the air and snatched the bracelet out of Dib's hands before he could stop him. "What are you--hey!"

He turned to Gaz. "Gaz, help!"

"What does this do?" Gir smashed his metal finger against the screen. Tak screamed, the handcuffs glowing red.

"Gir, stop!" Dib jumped, trying to grab him. His voice was desperate.

Tak screamed again as the handcuffs tightened. She pleaded for Gir to stop.

"Gir!" Gaz yelled over Tak's screaming. "We need that to help Zim!" She looked over her shoulder at the gaping hole in the door. Irkens were starting to come out of their houses, shooting looks inside the building. Their murmurs were starting to fill Gaz's ears.

"This will help Master?" Gir floated to the floor. "Why didn't you say so?" Gir marched to Dib and put it in his outstretched hand. Dib snatched it, his face twisted in annoyance. 

"Guys," Gaz said, taking a step back. The heel of her shoe crunched on the broken glass. The Irkens were starting to walk towards them, armed with whatever they had: a newspaper, a plate of food, a step stool. One of them was angrily hauling his entire snack cart up the steps and into the room. "We have to get out of here."

Tak was still screaming, although the pain had subsided and the handcuffs had returned to their normal blue glow. "Irkens!" She cried. "Help me! Now is the time to save your Tallest from these invaders!"

Gaz didn't even have time to appreciate the irony. Just as the crowd collectively let out a battle cry, Gaz raced to the elevator. It was the only door in the room.

Dib grabbed Tak, chair and all, and carried her to the elevator just as the doors opened. "Save me!" She screamed. 

Gir let out a screech and peppered the air with glitter. "You guys need glitter!" The crowd didn't seem fazed, and they marched on.

"Gir, get in here!" Gaz motioned for him to get inside. Gir looked at her, smiling, and flew into the elevator. Dib ducked just in time to see Gir hit the back wall with a loud clang. 

"Hi, wall," Gir said as he slid down. "Make me a sandwich."

Gaz, frozen in fear, could only watch as the crowd got closer. She willed the door closed with all of her might. Her eyes snapped to the snack stand guy--the biggest thing in the room. Several Irkens were working together to pick it up. "Come on, come on," Gaz muttered. She looked over at Dib. He was smashing the 'close' button with his pointer finger. They locked eyes. "Dib," Gaz said, her voice harsher than she expected. "Just know, that if we don't--" She glanced out the doors. The Irkens had succeeded in picking up the cart.

"One!" They chanted, pulling it back. "Two!"

"That--that--" Gaz fought for the words as the last count rattled through the entryway.

"Three!" With a roar the crowd flung the cart at the elevator doors just as they were closing. The clamor fell away as the elevator carried them up.

Gaz slumped back against the corner, breathing hard. "Thank God," she closed her eyes and rested her head against the wall. "I was going to say something stupid."

Tak, out of breath, was still going on. "You stupid...humans...going up to the Tallest...they'll arrest you..."

Dib looked at Gaz, eyes wide. "Where does this elevator go?"

Gaz tensed up. "It was the only door in the room!" She gestured to Tak. "Did you really have to bring her?"

"I panicked!" Dib ran his hands through his hair. "I just...it felt wrong to just leave her!"

"Why?"

"I don't know! She's Irken? She could help us?"

"I can help you," Tak said coolly, a smug smile on her face. Everyone looked at her, surprised by her sincerity. "But I won't," she spat. They all sighed. Typical.

The elevator dinged as it came to a stop. The doors opened, and there, in the giant room, with a window as big as a house, was...

Nothing. The room was empty. Gaz cautiously stepped out, the spear still in her hand. She had played enough video games to know that this was never a good sign. 

"My Tallest!" Tak cried. "I beg of you to dispose of these filthy creatures and imprison them for--" She stopped, finally absorbing the empty room. "Oh," she said, disappointed. "Where are they?"

"Shut her up, please," Gaz muttered, jerking her chin at Tak.

Gir flew out of the elevator with a screech. He slammed right into the giant window. "I can see my house from here!" He waved his little robotic arm. "Hi, house!"

Gaz rolled her eyes as she continued to creep around the room. She heard Dib place Tak's chair on the floor and angry whispering. Gaz looked over her shoulder. Dib's hand was on the back of Tak's chair, and he was leaning over to talk to her. Their faces were less than a foot apart. Gaz gulped. At least they were being quiet.

The room was big with no furniture. All evidence that the Tallest were once there was gone. No more clothes on the ground as if they were packing, no more suitcases. There was a hallway to the left of the elevator, but it was so dark Gaz couldn't see into it. She thought she heard whispering, and the drip of water. Some scratching noises, like a rat, floated out to her. She shivered. 

Gaz ran over to Tak and Dib on the other side of the room. "What's in there?" She whispered, pointing behind her.

Tak's eyes darted from the hallway to Gaz. She was sitting perfectly still. "Let me out," she urged.

Dib laughed quietly. "No way."

"I'll kiss you," Tak said, eyes serious.

Dib raised his eyebrows.

"No, no," Gaz waved her hands in front of her. "You're in no position to demand terms."

Dib held up a finger to Gaz. "Wait a second," he said, smiling and getting down on one knee. He was at eye level with Tak. "I'm willing to make a deal."

Tak didn't seem bothered by the deal she was making. "Sure, whatever."

"If we let you go, and you help us..."

Tak grimaced. "Can't I kiss you then turn you in?"

"No. If you help us, you'll kiss me when this is all over."

Tak winced, like the thought hurt her. "I don't want to help you."

"Do you want to know what I think?" Dib glanced at Gaz. "I don't know much about Irk. Despite Zim being..." Dib sighed. "Himself, I don't know a crazy amount about this planet or its customs. But, from my extensive extraterrestrial research, I can conclude that I have about a--" Dib moved his hand, like he was weighing something. "--73% chance of being correct about this." 

Gaz crossed her arms. "Correct about what?"

Dib's eyes darted back and forth between the two. "About why Tak is all of a sudden ready to make a deal." 

Tak's voice was quiet. "They'll imprison me," she said, after minutes of silence. "Again. I was already banished to Planet Dirt years ago, and that means that I'll never get to be an invader." She gulped. "I worked hard, you know? No one would believe that I got beat by that imbecile," she spat. "So I was deemed unfit." Her eyes were full of sorrow. "The best I could do was become a guard to the Tallest."

"And if they find you with humans, they'll assume that you are either too weak to defend yourself or that you were committing treason." Dib looked at Gaz. "She'll die in prison."

"Well, that's great news," Gaz said, eliciting frowns from Tak and Dib. "That means you have nothing to lose." 

"We'll make sure you don't go to prison," Dib said sincerely. "I'll make sure."

"But only if you agree to the terms." Gaz's eyes were dark slits. "You help us, you don't turn us in, and you..." she sighed. "Kiss Dib." She looked at him. "Does that seriously have to be a part of it?"

"Yes," both Dib and Tak answered at once. Tak blushed, and Dib ran a hand through his hair self-consciously.

"Okay," Gaz said, still a little uncertain. "Uncuff her, then."

Dib pushed a random button on the bracelet, playing his luck. The restraints popped open. Tak sat up slowly, rubbing her wrists. "We still need to know what's in that hallway," Gaz hissed. Tak nodded. 

"Well, the good news is that you're going to see Zim." Gaz's heart jumped into her throat. "But the bad news is that the only way to get to him is to get arrested."

Gaz looked at Dib. "Yikes."

Dib sighed. 

Tak rubbed her hands together, an evil glint in her eye. Gaz had time to wonder whether or not she'd made a mistake before Tak clamped the restraints on her wrists and turned the pain all the way up.

"It has to look like there was a struggle," Tak said sweetly. Gaz writhed on the floor, sweating bullets, her eyes bugging out of her head. Dib watched, his eyes full of worry, with a hand clamped over his mouth.

"Hi, house!" Gir continued, oblivious.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh, good! Mission accomplished. But now they have to leave the tower without getting spotted.

The eyes are the windows to the soul.

Zim sat on the cold stone floor, his head resting on his crossed arms. He looked through half open eyes at the floor between his knees.

Humans have a lot of weird ideas, he thought. Irkens didn't really have concepts like that. The soul was a completely human phenomenon. Zim had seen it many times: on greeting cards at the pharmacy, on balloons at the grocery store. But his first language was Irken--such human words meant nothing to him. The idea of a soul, something that gets left behind, something that captures the essence of one's life, really spoke to him in this moment.

There was a puddle to the left of him. He was careful not to touch it as he peered in. He expected someone stronger, more resilient, more deserving of the Invader title. But all he saw was a skinny green alien sitting alone in a cell. The eyes in the reflection were desperate, and Zim turned away and pressed his head back into his arms. He couldn't bear to look at himself anymore. For the first time in his whole life he was out of ideas.

For the first time in his whole life he was scared.

Irk didn't have the death penalty, but Irkens lived much longer than other species. His 400 year sentence would end with his cold body being discovered by the guards. His life would end in the incinerator, his ashes blown out to space. He wondered if his soul would burn too, or if it would remain here in this cold, dank cell for the rest of time. He sighed, closing his eyes. He didn't even hear the sound of the heavy iron door until it had already closed, another prisoner being thrown inside onto the small bed. 

"Cell B-13," a low voice said. "Just like you asked, boss."

"Perfect," a nasally voice responded. Zim's antennae shot to attention. Tak.

"Are you sure this is a good idea? They might tear each other apart in there."

The voices receded. "This human is a really bad one...hates Irkens..."

"...one less prisoner I guess..."

The prisoner on the bed let out a moan. Zim was surprised to hear that it was higher pitched: a girl's voice. 

Gaz sat up. She felt around on the bed. The comforter was scratchy and covered in stains. She recoiled. Her head was throbbing from the pain, but she didn't have any time to spare.

"Light?" She hissed.

Zim shook his head. "No light," he hissed back.

Gaz felt her way off of the bed and crept down on her hands and knees. She couldn't see Zim, but she could hear his breathing. She crawled towards the sound. Her hand smacked into a puddle of water, and she heard the hiss of burnt skin and a whimper.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered. "I'm sorry!" She dried her wet hand on the skirt of her dress. Tentatively, she reached her dry hand out. "Zim?"

Zim backed away. He could feel the heat coming off of her hand like a laser. "Who are you?"

"It's--it's Gaz. Is that you?" Silence. "Zim?"

Zim didn't know what to do. He stayed quiet.

Gaz sat back on her knees. "Is this the wrong room?" She muttered to herself.

"No, it's me," Zim whispered. "It's Zim."

Gaz breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh, Zim, thank God." She felt her way around the floor until she found him, warm and alive. Her hand grabbed his arm, her fingers pressed into the taught muscle. She was trying to hug him, her body halfway in his lap. She could feel his hand grabbing her elbow, the other pressed to her back. "We're going to save you. We're going to get you out of here."

It was too much for Zim to be only kind of holding her, but he didn't want to scare her off by crushing her in his arms. Her smell, the human mix of sweat and warmth, was enough to make him lightheaded. Her pushed her off, harder than he intended, and heard a solid hit to the ground. Gaz grunted with surprise, then was silent.

"Are you okay?" She whispered. She didn't come any closer.

"I'm okay."

"Okay." 

More silence. Zim felt guilt burning in his belly. He really liked her, but any show of human affection would get them both in bigger trouble. 

He heard Gaz crawl to the iron door. She turned her head to look down the hallway. A guard was making their way down, bathing everything in blue light. "Gaz," Zim hissed, "get back."

"It's okay," she whispered, waving her hand dismissively. "It's Dib."

Zim raised his eyebrows. "The Dib human has come to save Zim?"

Gaz turned to face him. Her face was glowing, gorgeous, her amber eyes big and open. Zim averted his eyes to Dib just as he walked up. 

The door opened, and Gaz slipped out. She stood next to her brother, who dwarfed her. Gaz couldn't be more than five foot five. "Come on," she hissed, motioning with her hand. Zim crawled out behind her and blinked in the blue light.

The three of them walked quickly to the end of the hallway, ignoring the whispers coming from each side. The big room was empty, and Gir was still smashed against the large window.

"MASTER!" Gir cried, his jet leaving a cloud of white smoke behind him. He crashed into Zim and they both landed flat on their backs. 

"Gir!" Zim said, his tone forceful. "Be quiet!"

Gir bowed his head.

"I'm happy to see you, too," Zim muttered, barely audible. He didn't look at him. Gir's head perked up.

"Tak is still distracting the guards," Dib said, removing his armor, "so we should go now."

Zim's head whipped to face him. "That monster is still here? Why didn't you dispose of her?"

Dib stared at Zim. "She helped you get out of prison," he answered flatly. "Maybe you should have a little more gratitude."

"Thankful? For her? Never!"

Dib stepped toe-to-toe with Zim. Zim was three inches shorter, and Dib's shirt had come off and was currently in his right hand. Zim didn't like his odds, and stepped back. He looked around nervously. Hand-to-hand combat wasn't taught in Invader school.

"Dib, you're disgusting." Gaz glared at him. "No one wants to see that."

Dib made a face at her and pulled his shirt over his head.

"Maybe," Zim started, nose turned up, "I will tell the disgusting Tak my gratitude if I see her." Zim glanced at the two. "Maybe."

"Tell her now!" Gir pointed to the window.

Tak floated behind it, her red spaceship shining in the setting Irken sun.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Whew! They made it out. Gaz almost dies, but she's okay. Dib and Tak have some alone time, but it's not as fun as it sounds.

Zim used his Pak to cut the glass, the hot metal gliding seamlessly through the window.

"Is...there a ladder?" Dib asked. "How are we supposed to get there?"

"Gir!" Zim commanded, "Take me to Tak's ship!"

"Yes, my master, I obey!" Gir saluted, his eyes glowing red. Then he scooped up Zim with a resounding "Whee!" and smacked the back of Tak's ship's interior just as she raised her windshield. Tak cursed and looked behind her. 

"Be careful!" she said angrily, shooting a glare at Gir. Zim rubbed his head.

Gaz cautiously stepped to the edge. She wasn't afraid of heights, but she didn't exactly love the idea of falling through space on a hostile planet. She looked up at Zim, whose black gloved hand was reaching out to hers. It was still over a foot away. "Jump!" Zim called. "You have to jump!"

"Take your time," Tak said sarcastically. "I only stalled the guards for a few minutes. The security cameras and sensors will be back up soon." She laughed, but there was no humor in it. Annoyance was clear in her eyes. "But by all means, please be comfortable when jumping into this foreign spaceship."

"Wow, this is so cool!" Dib's eyes were bright. "Look out, Gaz!" He took a couple of steps back and ran full force at the ship. He jumped, but only landed far enough to grab the ship's dashboard, exposed by the lack of windshield. "Gah!" 

Zim glared at him. "Can your feeble human body climb up on its own; or does a mighty, nay, superior, Irken have to help you?"

Dib glared right back and climbed up, out of breath. "You...suck..."

Zim turned his gaze back to Gaz, who was holding onto the side of the window. "I'll catch you!" Dib called, pushing Zim out of the way. "I'm stronger anyway!"

"A human's strength is no match for an Irken!" Zim shoved Dib forcefully, and he hit the side of the ship, grunting. 

"Be careful! Tak snapped, exasperated.

Dib rolled up his sleeves, his mouth twisted in anger. "She doesn't need you to help her--I'm her big brother. I can help her just fine."

"Is that why you left her to fend for herself?"

"You did the same thing!"

Gir, oblivious to Zim and Dib's argument, cried "I'LL HELP GAZZY!" and practically flew into her face.

Gaz, eyes wide, only had time to squeak out "What are you--" before Gir settled himself under her knees and took off towards the ship, Gaz riding Gir's shoulders piggyback style. She screamed, tensing up from the thought of hitting the back wall as hard as Zim had, but was surprised when Zim caught Gir with one hand and gently lifted her off.

He's stronger than I thought, she mused to herself. She stood momentarily in Zim's arms, his hands on either side of her waist. It was hard to tell what he was thinking, but she thought his mouth was a little warped with concern. His eyes, however, were red and unflinching. She couldn't look directly into them or she was afraid that he'd know how she felt. Her emotions were visible all over her face, and she stepped back, head down. She muttered a quiet "thanks" before stalking off to the corner where she sat on the floor, knees drawn to her chest.

"Your ship is so small," Tak mused, her face distorted in amusement. "Did you really not know that the Tallest hated you?"

Zim felt a burn in his stomach. The more he thought about it, the more it became obvious to him. He decided to not answer. He tried to glare at her, but it came out gooey and sad. He turned to open the windshield. "I'm going back to Earth," he spat.

Tak shrugged. "Good."

Zim sent Gir out to activate the walkway, which was used between two ships for easy transfer of passengers. Gir sat in the cockpit, repeatedly pushing the 'snack' button. Thousands of individual French fries rained from the ceiling, much to Gir's delight. He let out a scream, shoving fries in his mouth by the fistful.

"Gir!" Zim yelled. "Gir, stop that!" He ran across the walkway.

Gaz looked between Tak and Dib. They both looked uncomfortable, and were staring at her, as if willing her away. Gaz took a step back. Dib opened his mouth. "I think Zim--"

"Yeah, sure." She stalked off. She didn't want to see the last part of the deal--the thought of it already made her feel sick.

Dib leaned against the dashboard. "So," he started, crossing his arms. A small smile played on his lips.

"So," Tak said. She didn't return the warm candor. Her body was rigid, her eyes narrowed.

Dib's eyes glazed over with uncertainty. "Will I ever see you again?"

Tak shrugged. "Probably. If the plan goes like we said, I should still be the Tallest's main guard." She stood up tall. "Once they find out that Zim's gone, they will probably come to Earth to destroy him." For the first time that day Tak really looked into Dib's eyes. "I hope you'll be careful," she muttered. Her eyes were big and open, without even a hint of sarcasm. Dib felt his heart bloom in his chest. He gently took her arm and drew her towards him. She didn't resist.

"Hey," he said quietly, searching her eyes. "I've stayed alive this long."

Tak just nodded. She looked away, behind him at the ship, and the spell was broken. Dib let his hand fall back to his side. "See you in six months?" He said halfheartedly.

Tak nodded, then turned her back to him. "They're waiting for you." Her voice was hard, but had a softness around it that made Dib hopeful.

He slipped out of the window without another word, and without his kiss. Their mission wasn't over quite yet--they still had to prepare Earth for an Irken invasion. Dib told himself to not look back as he heard Tak's ship whirring behind him, the final whoosh of sound informing him that Tak had left. Dib gulped. There was nothing left to do but walk on, into the cabin of Zim's ship, and hope that two Irkens, two humans, and an uncontrollable robot were enough to stop an entire alien armada from completely destroying the Earth.


End file.
